Assam laksa ahoy!

This recipe is specially for la Signora yang jauuuuh di mata.

I know many people love asam laksa. For me I think I can live with 2 full meals of asam laksa a day for days without feeling jemu or jelak. Only maybe a little stomach upset due to the masamness of the laksa. In fact there's so many ways to eat asam laksa, that is the kuah asam you can eat with rice, mihun or pasta beside the regular laksa.

This particular kuah laksa is not the traditional one, it is the improvise version. Or to quote Dr Fatma -- laksa tipu! Yeeees....something like that, but it save you a lot of trouble and it is very nice.

When you crave for asam laksa aka laksa nyonya aka laksa orang malas, you just grab a can of sardin (big tin), a can of pineapple in syrup and a packet of Maggi Tumisan Asam Pedas paste. Pour everything in the pot,add water about 4-5 sardine cans ( or any amount of kuah you want )bring it to boil. Then you put in otak udang about2-3 tablespoons, daun kesum ,bunga kantan kalau ada,kalau takde bubuh aje bunga orkid ke atau bunga lily ke ( at your own risk!)

To camouflage the sardine, boil 2 or 3 fresh ikan kembung or any fish yang seangkatan dengannya , hancurkan and throw in the pot. You can add salt or asam keping if you want ( optional ). For garnishing, use salad, cucumber, more fresh chillies,lime/lemon, big onion and boiled eggs. And serve hot. It's good for breakfast,lunch, tea or dinner.

Gulai tempoyak anyone?

Many of us like gulai tempoyak ikan patin. Ikan patin is not easy to get , the one that is sold in the market not as good as patin sangkar from Pahang. So the replacement of regular masak tempoyak ikan patin is --masak tempoyak ikan tenggiri or ikan kembung. Then, there's the problem of where to get the tempoyak , my advice is go to Giant or Jaya Jusco or pasar malam and buy prepacked isi durian ( if we buy whole durian that would be more expensive and we are not sure wether they are good or not ).



To further save money plant pokok cili ( red chilli and cili api ) which is the most important ingredient in any masak tempoyak. Also plant some daun kesum and turmeric for the leaves and fresh turmeric which is second most important ingredient.Chilli, kesum and turmeric plants are easy to grow in pots.


So, blend red chillies and cili padi with fresh turmeric, bring to boil,add durian or tempoyak, turmeric leaves and daun kesum, a little bit of sugar ( to balance the taste ), salt to taste and one or two slice of asam keping ( if you don't have asam keping, squeeze one or two slices of lime ). Finally add ikan tenggiri or ikan kembung,let it boil for a few more minutes and you can enjoy the lesser version of ikan patin masak tempoyak !.

Walhasil balik asal

YAB Perdana Menteri Malaysia,

Kekalahan Bukit Gantang dan Bukit Selambau merupakan satu signal bahawa BN MESTI BERUBAH DENGAN KADAR SEGERA.

1. Cara berkempen di tv yang sungguh lapuk , seperti pengumuman tentang projek baru yang akan dilaksanakan, ahli parti pembangkang keluar parti beramai-ramai, pilih beberapa orang kampung memburuk-burukkan wakil parti lawan dan lain-lain sebenarnya boleh jadi senjata makan tuan.

2. Kalau kalah kali ini ( pilihan raya kecil ) jangan putus asa teruskan usaha untuk memenangi hati rakyat dan buat kempen rumah ke rumah ( mengenali/mendekati/mesra rakyat ) walau pun pru masih lama lagi ( time flies ).

3. Pilih calon yang betul-betul disukai rakyat , tidak semestinya yang disukai oleh pihak atasan sahaja.

4. Masukkan ramai orang-orang muda, go head hunting bagi orang-orang yang berkebolehan untuk menjadi ahli-ahli Umno di setiap cawangan dan bahagian.

Berubah 360 darjah , jika tidak walhasil balik asal!

Bijak lebih!

Masa kecil dulu,selalu duduk dengan mak sedara di rumah kedainya. Depan kedai runcit, belakang tempat tinggal terdiri dari dua bilik tidur,satu bilik air,satu perigi,satu indoor garden dan satu outdoor garden. Di seberang jalan ada panggung wayang (this was in the 50's and the 60's in a cowboy town lookalike ie two rows of double story wooden link shophouses / a mining town / somewhere in the pesisir pantai of Pahang ). Setiap malam tengok wayang tak kira cerita apa Hindustan, Tamil, China, Orang Putih ( zaman John Wayne and Lana Turner atau kalau ikut bacaan poster wayang, John Lana Wayne Tana ( Turner )

Wayang cerita Melayu pula jarang datang,jadi kalau ada cerita Melayu panggung penuh dan dibuat dua kali tayangan ie satu pada pukul 6 petang dan tayangan ke dua pada pukul 9.30 malam. Semua wayang Melayu adalah dari Singapura keluaran Shaw Brothers.

Filem yang jadi kesukaan/kegilaan ialah cerita Hindustan klasik yang ada main pedang . Paling dingati ialah cerita hero pakai topeng mata ala-ala Zorro dan heronya pula ialah Ranjan.Ada juga filem ala Zorro versi Tamil yang terdiri dari 7 wanita berkuda, bertopeng dan berpedang. Ramai juga antara kami yang bercita-cita nak jadi Zorro.

Cerita China pula yang klasik yang jadi favourite. Cerita kebanyakannya tentang maharaja China atau cerita pembesar-pembesar. Ada cerita anak raja siang jadi ikan dalam kolam dan malam menjelma jadi anak raja (? ).Dulu semua filem tiada sari kata ,jadi penonton mereka -reka sendiri dialog dan jalan cerita berdasarkan dari aksi dan dialog yang tak difahami itu.

Jadi perangai mereka cerita dan dialog serta membuat kesimpulan sendiri tu kekal hingga sekarang. Bila tengok wayang di tv selalu tengok sekerat sebab dah buat ending sendiri. Bila watak-watak berdialog ,kita pun buat dialog sendiri dalam hati. Ada cerita yang pada awalnya sungguh gempak tapi sampai dipertengahannya plot jadi lemah dan ending jadi simple problem solving , sebab tu sesetengah filem tengok sekerat atau tiga suku jalan saja. Suami dan anak-anak selalu geram bila I tak meneliti dialog watak-watak itu. Mereka kata I bijak lebih, merosakkan karya orang!

Banyak juga cerita-cerita yang I tak boleh terima , seperti science fiction. Contoh ialah time traveller atau pun space craft ( yang tak pernah landing ) which I think it is a real crap. Ramai orang beremosi bila menonton filem-filem romantik. Bila mereka siarkan filem bloopers, I mula rasa tertipu dengan lakonan/cerita yang dilakonkan itu---iaitu semata-mata lakonan. Jadi tak mudah tertipu dengan apa yang dilihat di layar perak atau di kaca tv. Bagi saya yang reka cerita itu adalah manusia biasa seperti kita ,jadi tak perlulah saya rasa terpegun atau terpesona dengan apa yang dihidangkan itu! ( kate doh bijok lebih! )

Love hate relationship

Ada pepatah Arab yang mengatakan roh manusia terdiri dari pasukan-pasukan seperti dalam tentera . Jika kita dari satu batalion yang sama kita akan suka atau mesra antara satu sama lain. Tetapi kalau roh kita dari batalion yang berlainan, kita akan menjadi kurang sesuai dengan seseorang itu walaupun baru pertama kali bersua. Jadi jangan terkejut kalau kita menyampah pada orang tak tentu fasal atau suuuka sangat kat seseorang tu,walaupun baru saja kenal.

When I was in primary school I had this friend by the name of Salmah. We were quite close and I used to go to her house to play. She had a sister named Zaleha who is about two years younger than me. Somehow or rather we really hated each other- she did't like me and I didn't like her. This went on until I was in form three. After form three I left my kampung and I never met them since then. When I was wiser I apologised to Zaleha for what I did to her. She shrugged off and said ..Ahh zaman budak buat apa nak ambil kira sangat.

Have you ever smiled at people and they just stared at you? Or just ignored you? Well, this happened to me many times. I think only celebrities will smile back
at you because even though they don't know you but they know that you know them. Come to think of it why should we smile at people unnecessarily, people might think that we are tak betul. Then again what's wrong with throwing smiles at people , it is also an amal jariah.Once in KLCC someone greeted me with Assalamualaikum and I answered her with full semangat and right away I salam with her. Both of us were so pleased and masyaAllah, how nice to receive an honest salam from someone you don't know!

Have you ever experience salam tak ikhlas? It is when you meet people in a majlis and they will salam with you without looking at you. Some really make sure to salam with their fingertips. And in the case of Umno delegations they have different salam ie salam berisi or salam kosong. So if you give them salam angin, don't expect them to vote for you, no matter how good you are! And mind you that is not bribery ,that is pleasantry. Those who are most pleasant, of course they are worthy of becoming a leader.

Excess baggage

When people come back from performing hajj or umrah,they will bring a lot of gift for family and friends. The gifts usually ketayap, tasbih or minyak atar for man and scarves ,celak or henna for ladies. To the loved ones or close friends they might give bigger things like sejadah or jubah. I remember those days we used to get all these things from relatives and friends.

So, when our turn came to perform hajj, we find it so difficult to buy things for souveniors. We have to count every relatives and friends and buy things that suit them. One of my sister in law is very clever to choose the gifts for all of us. She will bring back things for all her brothers and sisters and their spouses plus all their children. Not to mention for those who come to visit her. Somehow she will have enough of things for everybody.

I wonder how some people can bring so many things back home. Once this was the topic of conversations between me and my friends. Finally I got to know one secret. They told me ( I was in Kedah at that time ), usually when they come back from Makkah they will go to Pekan Rabu Alor Setar to buy extra ketayap, minyak atar ,sejadah or tasbih. Now I understand why some people have endless things to give each and everyone who came visiting.

I was very attracted to handmade carpets sold by Iranian people during hajj time those days in the 80's. I was really tempted to buy them,but my husband warned me , if we had excess baggage I had to choose, either the carpet or me got to stay back. But now things become so easy, one can buy anything without worrying about baggage, they can post right from there to their hometown.

Gandingan N dan M yang mantap.

Tahniah DS Najib yang telah dengan rasminya menjadi Presiden Umno pada hari ini. Pada saya DSN telah menunjukkan kematangan berpolitik, sikap yang gentlemen dan sabar serta akur dengan janji peralihan kuasa oleh Pak Lah. Akhirnya hari yang ditunggu tiba juga dan peralihan kuasa dapat dilakukan dengan cara yang paling terhormat.

Saya juga ucapkan setinggi-tinggi tahniah kepada TS Muhyiddin sebagai Timbalan Presiden Umno yang telah berikrar bahawa beliau akan menjadi orang kedua dalam parti dan kerajaan dan akan tetap bersikap seperti orang ke dua ( not hissing behind his boss's neck like some other deputies ). Beliau juga mengatakan akan mengambil iktibar dari apa yang pernah berlaku antara ketua dan penolong ( yang rakus kuasa dan tak sabar justru menghuru harakan parti dan negara ) itu sebagai panduan kepada beliau.

Kepada Khairi Jamaluddin pula gunakan kemudaan , kebijaksanaan dan semangat yang berkobar-kobar itu untuk menarik semula golongan muda kita yang rata-rata suka kepada perjuangan yang beroientasi ala ala keganasan dengan berdemonstrasi dijalanan . Semoga beliau benar-benar menjadi ketua pemuda yang berjiwa rakyat dan semoga golongan pemuda akar umbi dapat sinonimkan diri mereka dengan ketua mereka.

Orang -orang muda pula yang ingin berbakti pada parti Umno yang selama ini tidak ada peluang yang cukup luas , rasa-rasanya keadaan sudah berubah. Umno sekarang sudah terbuka untuk semua dan bukan untuk sesetengah orang sahaja! Best of luck!

Ps.
Err, tabik DSN, kalau kritik hal politik takpe kot berterang-terangan. Tapi kalau nak tegur hal pribadi ,barulah bergelap-gelapan.

Wanna be a doctor?

People always say that certain plants can cure all kind of sickness.For example certain plants are good for hypertension, cholesterol and diabetes. So there is always a story about a friend of a friend who suffered from stroke ( and became  paralysed )but  after taking that certain plants he can move his hand and foot. So when people hear about the story they start taking/drinking it even though they are not yet being diagnosed with any of the said sickness . They said might as well take the medicine before the sickness strikes you.

Daun hempedu bumi is known for its medicinal value. Like this story from a friend of a friend who was being hospitalised due to diabetes, but after taking daun hempedu bumi suddenly his condition improved so fast that even the doctor was amazed by it. ( of course they won't tell the doctor what they take ).

So when we hear all this 'true' story we won't hesitate to tell our friends how good that certain plants are. Many have tried and they can feel the improvement. Thus, many will stop from taking the doctor's prescription and replace it with the recommended herbs. And the story ends there. We don't know what happened after that, either they are fully recovered or after sometimes they're back to the square one that is suffering from hypertension, high cholesterol or diabetes.

Nang bo ti nang kui bo ti kui

Yeah, orang bukan orang hantu bukan hantu! I often heard this phrase uttered by my late auntie when I was small. This phrase refers to a person who is jahat dan tak makan saman. These are one of the few phrases or words that I still remember until today. But I couldn't recall who fell in this nang bo ti nang kui bo ti kui or orang bukan orang hantu bukan hantu category in my kampung at that time.

But I do remember the word 'bo patut' ie tak patut that referred to a person in my kampung during the 60's. He was a successful businessman , he got a sundry shop and he was dealing with cane and rubber business. I asked my mother why people called him Bo Patut? She told me when he was young he 'buat jahat' to this particular lady who also owned a sundry shop, therefore the Chinese community sanctioned him by calling him Bo Patut.This Bo Patut was so succesful in business eventually he got the title JP and people called him Dato' JP! ( during that time title Jaksa Pendamai was the highest and very rare award received by a person in my kampung therefore people called the recipient 'Dato' ).

Wayang pek ji troop will come to my kampung during Perayaan Hantu. They set up wooden stage near tokong area and the show lasted for 7 nights. Those days I didn't know where the Chinese opera came from and who paid for it. I used to go and see and became very familiar with the story, the costumes the high pitch songs ,the kungfu and swords play. But during the 90's I found out there were no more Chinese opera but it was replaced with modern kugiran. So we used to say, Wah, macam wayang pek ji! if someone put on a very thick make up.

Once upon a time

Masa kecil dulu suka sangat bersumpah, sikit-sikit ---' sumpah, lillah !' tak caya tanya mak aku! Tak cukup sumpah suruh mak konfirm kebenaran seseorang. Tapi tak sorang pun pergi tanya mak sapa-sapa tentang kebenaran sesuatu. Cukup dengan nama mak saja semua orang percaya.

Duduk di kampung ramai kawan, banyak aktiviti lasak,seperti main hujan, main anak patung dan bila besar sikit main anak-anakan yang dibuat dari kain dan di beri pakai baju dan main masak-masak,besar sikit lagi main konda-kondi, tali skipping yang dibuat dari getah ( rubber band ) yang disambung-sambung. Besar sikit lagi main panjat pokok petai belalang yang rendang dan senang budak-budak perempuan nak panjat sebab tak tinggi sangat. Bila masuk darjah lima main melukis dan mewarna di atas kertas lukisan beli dengan cikgu 5 sen sehelai.Bila masuk tingkatan satu mula main di padang sekolah, main netball,pingpong dan pergi perpustakaan baca buku dan pinjam buku.

Dalam ramai-ramai kawan ada yang tak berapa sesuai,tapi berkawan juga. Selalu bergaduh dan tak tegur menegur. Kamu jahat tak nak tegur! tarik muka 14 dan jeling mata macam nak juling. Petang esok pergi rumah dia ,sambung main batu selemban dan share makan kacang goreng.

Inilah kawan-kawan yang kita ingat sampai bila walaupun dah berpuluh tahun tak bersua muka. Anehnya,kawan yang kita selalu bermasam muka,bila bertemu setelah dewasa menjadi begitu mesra dan ketawa bila teringat zaman kanak-kanak dulu.

Takziah

Siti,

Waiting for you on Sunday,but when Nuwal came in the evening, she told me the sad news. Auntie ucapkan takziah di atas kepemergian ayahanda Siti dan auntie doakan semoga roh beliau ditempatkan bersama-sama orang yang beriman,amin.
As for you,banyaklah bersabar di atas segala dugaan yang Allah beri, 'sesungguhnya di samping kesukaran akan datang kemudahan '-AlInsyirah- ayat 5&6.